loficharm | on the care & feeding of a cat who is not a cat // for John

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on the care & feeding of a cat who is not a cat // for John

September 19 (cont'd) - September 22

Bursting out of the mansion into the insufficient relief of cool night air is only step one, and it's such a fraught step that Martin freezes up, not sure what comes next. John is still clutched in his arms, trembling but also holding still with a level of tension that would be alarming in an ordinary cat, and is alarming either way. His claws are still digging sharply into Martin's shoulder, but the pain is a distant bother, nothing Martin has any room to worry about just now. He's breathing heavily, adrenaline still up and his throat sore from shouting at Magnus to no avail. He stands out front, dimly aware he's being watched by the bouncers, and looks around like he doesn't know where to go.

He pulls himself together quickly because he has to. Focus on what's important, what's right in front of you. Think like Basira. One foot before the other. He has to get home. All of John's belongings, his clothes, his phone, his keys, it all disappeared into this new body. There'll be no accessing his flat in the Bramford. Martin has to get them to his own, which might actually be further from here. God.

"It's all right," he whispers, a bit manic, like he doesn't totally know what he's saying. "I-it's all right. I'm - we're gonna figure this out."

He starts walking. Reaches the city proper, Old Forest Rd., and he'll just follow that until he gets to the other end, to Candlewood.

"Gonna be all right," he says again, his voice trembling a little, resisting the various impulses toward comfort that might be welcome on an actual cat - stroking his fur, holding any tighter than he absolutely has to, even, mortifyingly, planting a kiss on his head, a thought he banishes in a little rush of panic atop panic. The best he can do for John is hold him as securely as possible without constricting and just. Get him somewhere safe. And then, the next step will be next. Whatever that is.

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God, it's weird seeing John move, so much of it still innately human enough that it wanders a bit toward the uncanny valley. Seeing him wipe his chin and nod, it's mildly unnerving. But Martin is grateful, too, that this isn't worse, that Magnus didn't just transform John fully into a cat, his mind lost with the rest of it. He's still John in there, and they can still find ways to communicate.

He sits down on the floor again, hating being so high above John; it just feels wrong on multiple levels.

"Well," he sighs. God, he's so tired, he feels like he could just fall asleep, but he doesn't like the idea of leaving John up by himself like this. He just doesn't know where to begin. It's possible Daine is at the party herself, he supposes - it did seem like the sort of thing every visitor to Darrow knows about and may attend - the upshot of which would mean she might still be awake. But he doesn't want to involve anyone else without John's permission, and he hasn't even met Daine yet.

"I'm not sure what to do," he admits. "God, I really just want to go back there and - and-" He's not sure what. He looks away, huffing in frustration, his hands pulled into fists with no target, just settled tense but useless in his lap. "I can't believe him, I can't believe he did this to you, just - just like that. What a prick!"

He's not sure the anger is helpful, but he needs to let it out somehow. So much of it got swallowed up in the immediate urgency of getting John out of there.

"I just-" He relaxes his hands and drops his head down, his shoulders hunched in defeat. "I'm sorry I dragged you along, this wouldn't have happened if I hadn't..." He purses his lips and lets out a breath slowly. He needs to focus. He needs to figure out a way to communicate with John. Yes or no questions seem like the best option right now, something John can reliably respond to. He's just so tired and out of sorts he's not sure where to begin.

Edited 2019-09-22 18:43 (UTC)

It's more of a relief than it should be when Martin sits down. He still towers over John, which is weird at best, but far more unnerving when he's standing up and downright brobdingnagian. John listens, gratified by Martin's indignation. At least one of them is saying what they're both thinking. John lets out a quiet huff of agreement when he pronounced Magnus a prick, another feline approximation of a human sort of sound.

Less pleasing is the apology, the more overt admission of guilt. Even if he could speak, John isn't sure how he'd go about reassuring him. There's no getting around the unfortunate truth of it: John was only at the party at Martin's behest, and this wouldn't have happened if he or both of them had just gone out to a pub or had a quiet evening in. But Martin isn't the one who actually did this to him. They couldn't have guessed Magnus would be so bloody unreasonable. Christ, given that Magnus is apparently the sort of person who does things like this, maybe it's just as well that John was there. He wouldn't have wanted something like this -- or worse -- to befall Martin, instead, because he'd gone without backup.

Martin has his head bowed, eyes fixed on his own hands, and John breaks his deliberate silence to get his attention, letting out a low, soft trill. Then he carefully shakes his head: no. This is already difficult and miserable enough without Martin sinking into self-recrimination. If nothing else, he doesn't want Martin to think he's angry with him, or holding him accountable for all this.

The sighing is weird, too - he can almost fool himself into thinking John is still here, still human. He's never heard a cat breathe that deliberately. The trill, however, is closer to a noise one might expect, and he looks up, a little bewildered as well as cautiously charmed by it. Seeing John shake his head - it's as odd as the rest of it, but the meaning is quite clear, and Martin finally manages to offer him a tired, half-hearted smile. Even now, John doesn't want him blaming himself for this, and that's... he's right. He couldn't have known this would happen, and the guilt is an unnecessary distraction. They have far bigger problems.

"You're right," he says aloud, trying to effect a brisk and more professional tone. And much as he might like to go make a very ill-advised series of decisions where Magnus is concerned, there are more pressing logistical issues to deal with.

He wishes he could just ask John directly what he wants or needs, but that isn't currently practical, so: "Well, since we've got 'yes' and 'no' covered..." He sighs. "Are you... hungry?"

Edited 2019-09-22 19:18 (UTC)

It's not much of a smile that Martin has to offer, small and exhausted, but it's better than nothing. Hell, that John managed to earn a smile by some other means than simply embarrassing himself is... sort of nice. To the extent that 'nice' can apply to his current situation, that is.

He gives Martin's next question a beat of consideration before shaking his head again. He's still too unsettled for the thought of food to have any appeal, and besides, what would Martin give him? The absence of actual cat food in his flat could probably be deemed a mercy, as the thought of eating that is appalling, but most of the human foods John could safely consume like this would require some preparation. He doesn't want to put Martin through the trouble of cooking him eggs at this hour.

“Okay.” Martin nods. Simple enough to start. At the thought of rattling through the full list of things he might need to ask, however, he hesitates before deciding to skip ahead several pages in the proverbial script.

“Do you want me to try and get a hold of Daine now?” he says. “I told you about her a bit, she's... got all the animal friends. She can talk to them." He shrugs. "You might actually be able to talk to her.”

John's tail twitches idly as he mulls over the prospect of bringing another person into this. His instinct is to hide himself away until he's back to normal, and the thought of meeting someone under these circumstances isn't exactly pleasant. But if he could actually communicate with someone clearly, without the limitations he's currently facing with Martin... it is tempting. And while he doesn't know Daine, personally, he'd like to think someone connected with animals might appreciate how wrong this is instead of merely finding it hilarious.

He looks up at Martin and nods, trying not to get his hopes up.

Martin nods in return, relieved John is willing to at least try the option, and without getting up he fishes his phone out of his pocket. Focusing on the simple task of texting Daine is both a much-needed respite and a stark reminder of how tired he is, but he manages. After a bit of back and forth, he looks back up at John.

"She's on her way," he says with another faint smile. "Apparently this is just something he does. She seems... properly annoyed." He doesn't mention that 'annoyed' comes through from Daine as 'odds bobs,' which is so delightful he almost laughs, but he manages to keep himself dry and resigned, which feels far more appropriate to the situation.

Daine lets herself in the back stairwell to avoid getting caught up in needless unpleasantries with the landlord and climbs up to Martin's floor. As she does, she makes sure to keep her magic closed off. She doesn't know Martin's friend, but she can guess he's not pleased about any of this, and taking an animal shape for the first time is overwhelming enough without adding her magic to the mix. It'd probably be better for him if he didn't feel her coming.

That, and it'd probably be better for her if she was sitting down before she tried to talk with him. She's never met someone changed into animal shape by Magnus before, but her experience with Numair -- to say nothing of Biffy and Lyall -- have her suspecting that it won't be as easy to talk to him as it would a proper cat. At best, it might be like trying to tune a radio to a station that's hard to land on squarely. At worst, she might not be able to reach him at all, and trying will just give her a headache.

Well, she can cross that bridge when she comes to it. For now, she softly knocks on Martin's door.

Martin gets up gingerly when he hears the knock, not wanting to startle John overmuch - he can only imagine how disorienting everything must be, bigger and probably louder than normal. He pads over to the door and - taking care to look this time, just in case - opens it to let Daine in.

"Thank you for coming," he says softly and with a tired smile. "He's, erm..." He steps back, seeing John still over by the water bowl. "He's not very mobile, I think... I think he's having a hard time working out all the... logistics?" He shrugs. He doesn't really want to speak for John, but he's not sure what Daine is expecting, or if this'll even work.

"This is John," he says belatedly. The weirdness of the whole situation certainly doesn't discount the importance of being polite. "John, this is Daine."

Edited 2019-09-22 23:32 (UTC)

"Of course," Daine replies, taking in how weary Martin looks and giving his arm a sympathetic pat in passing. His friend -- John -- is sitting a little ways off, back stiff and straight and eyeing her warily, which she supposes she can't blame him for. It's a fair strange way to meet someone.

But manners are manners, and once Daine has set down her bag and settled herself on the floor a polite meter or so away, she nods to him. "It's nice to meet you, John." He glances from her to Martin, then echoes the nod uncertainly. Daine offers him a faint smile, then adds, "At least Magnus had the decency to turn you into a handsome cat. Though I s'pose that's a small mercy, all things considered."

John blinks, ears swiveling back uncertainly, and she sees a little of the tension leave his shoulders. Probably just thanks to bewilderment, but it's better than nothing. "I've got my magic locked down right now," she carefully explains, "because I'm not sure what it'll feel like, to you. You're not a proper cat, after all. But we might still be able to work something out, if you don't mind being patient with me."

After John considers her offer and nods again, she turns to look at Martin. "I couldn't trouble you for some tea, could I?" she asks. "Only I could use a bit of a boost." More to the point, she thinks this initial, fiddly stuff might be easier if Martin isn't hovering like a mother hen.

Martin watches her closely, not from any suspicion but pure curiosity, wanting to see how she handles this. He appreciates that she sits down, keeping a safe distance, and reflects that the rules of engagement for Jonathan Sims and for cats are actually... quite similar, in a lot of ways.

What he's absolutely not expecting is the way Daine describes John's cat form as handsome, and he barely manages to stifle a startled cough into a... slightly more subtle clearing of his throat. It's both the only time he thinks he's heard anyone describe John thus, and the first time he could imagine hearing it without a kneejerk rush of jealous anger, but it's still... terribly uncomfortable, whatever the context. He doesn't need to be told twice to make her some tea.

He steps back into the kitchen and goes about fixing them each a cup, having to remind himself not to make one for John as well. He keeps an eye on John, not wanting to stare but not wanting to let him out of his sight, either.

Edited 2019-09-23 00:06 (UTC)

Christ, she's young. Late teens, if he had to guess, and he's immediately apprehensive, sitting up straight and doing his best to scrape together as much dignity has he can muster. But it isn't really necessary, in the end. Daine sits down and gets to business with a frankness that's both foreign and refreshing (though being called handsome throws him for a brief loop, not being a compliment he's accustomed to receiving in any form, let alone delivered in the same matter-of-fact tone as one might read a weather forecast).

He isn't blind to the way she neatly redirects Martin towards tea, and he's wondering if he ought to be worried or impressed when she actually winks at him. He huffs without quite meaning to, another human sound of amused acknowledgment, and Daine smiles.

"I'm going to try opening up a bit," she tells him, tapping the side of her head for emphasis. "See if I can reach you. It shouldn't hurt or anything, but I s'pose it might feel a bit... odd." Privately, John thinks he's heard more encouraging openers, but the possibility of actually being understood is alluring enough that he stays put, tail twitching.

He isn't sure what her 'opening up' is going to look like, but all she does is shut her eyes and take a slow breath, apparently meditating. He watches her dubiously for a few moments, then glances over at Martin, who isn't so preoccupied with the tea that he doesn't have time to dart curious looks at the both of them. John looks back to Daine, sitting there with an outward serenity that he both envies and finds almost offensive, and then he... he feels something. A sort of tentative, feather-light brush against his mind, which is shortly followed by the sound of Daine's voice.

Hullo? Can you hear me?

John half-rises, his tail puffed and his eyes wide, and a faint line appears between her brows. It's all right, she... says? Thinks? Just think what you want to say, nice and clear.

Christ, is what he thinks, before realizing how unhelpful that is. This... connection, unnerving as it is, might not last for long. He can't waste it. Can you hear me? Can you tell Martin... he pauses, not knowing how to finish that sentence, before eventually deciding, Tell him... thank you. For getting me here.

Daine blinks her eyes open, then looks up at Martin. "He wants me to thank you. For getting him here, he says."

God, it actually worked. John's eyes are still wide, but he sits back down, his gaze flicking between Daine and Martin.

Daine offers John a rather vague explanation of what she's going to do, and Martin has to tamp down on the urge to explain it in greater detail, as if he has any idea what he's talking about. He needs to just let her do her business. So he watches the kettle, which heats steadily in spite of conventional wisdom, his eyes flicking repeatedly to John. For several moments there's a silence that he knows is probably productive but cannot help but find hopelessly frustrating nevertheless - the only outward indication that anything is happening at all being the startled lurch John makes halfway to his feet. Martin looks over quickly, but John continues to stare at Daine; and it is she who finally blinks out of her evident meditation and looks at Martin.

When she relays a message, Martin feels for a very embarrassing moment like he could just collapse into relieved weeping, as though there was ever any doubt John was still in there - it just feels so good to know there is a way to talk to him. But beyond that, far more powerful than that, is the shock of the message he actually chose. The first thing John wanted to say, not even knowing if this would work or, or if it'll stick, was to thank him.

Martin looks at Daine for only a moment after she speaks, and then his stare rests fully on John, who's once again sat down. The kettle begins to heat enough that he can hear the water roiling, and he switches the burner off before it can get loud, without sparing it a glance. He feels - it's so stupid, but he still feels like he might cry over that, over something so small and simple. Knowing that as horrible as all this has been, he helped, and John is... that he's grateful.

He manages to smile, weak but deeply relieved. "Oh, I - y-yeah," he says. "Of course. Of course."

What else would he do?

He forces himself to return his attention to preparing the tea. He has a lot of questions he wants to ask, but he's not sure how difficult this is for them, or if there's a limit to it. Probably best to just... get Daine her tea, and wait it out.

There's a moment after Daine translates John's message where she half-expects Martin to just start weeping, and between that and the funny little noise he'd made when she called John handsome, she can't help wondering if he's a bit smitten. Mithros, that'd complicate things even further, wouldn't it? Does John know? She gives her head a little shake; it's none of her business, really.

Getting a bead on John's mind had been tricky, but now that she's found it, she's not worried about losing it. They have what must sound to Martin like a one-sided exchange as Daine sips her tea, with Daine speaking aloud for manners' sake and translating John's side of things when it's needful. He has some strong but unsurprising opinions about actually living like a cat, which... well, she can hardly blame him. She likes cat shape, but she wouldn't like being stuck against her will for days at a stretch.

Food is the first concern, and John immediately makes it known that he'd sooner starve than eat cat food. She figures she'll have to go through Martin's fridge and cupboards and let him know some two-legger things John could safely eat over the coming days. At least that issue shouldn't be too difficult; she can't imagine Magnus's spell will last more than a few days, or a week at the outset. So long as John doesn't eat anything outright poisonous, nothing else he might try will have time to hurt him overmuch over such a short span.

(She delicately switches over to just mind-speech when asking about the possibility of a litter box, and gets such a desperately indignant look for her troubles that she doesn't even bother to pursuing that line of questioning. It's not as if he couldn't use the privy, so long as he's careful not to fall in.)

Really, it seems as if the most pressing issue is the one Martin mentioned right off: that John just doesn't know how this shape works. "Cat shape is a fun one," she muses as she finishes off her tea, "but it's always weird when you're trying it out for the first time." She looks between John and Martin, feeling a slight pang of embarrassment. She hadn't got round to telling Martin about this aspect of her magic, so he couldn't have warned John about it. "If you like, I could take cat shape, too, and sort of... show you?" It'll be much easier for her to walk him through it if she's in that shape, too, not least of all because if she gets too deep into thinking about how cat shape feels, she'll just end up shifting, anyway. To Martin, she adds, "Though it'll mean not being able to talk to you for a bit. It'll be fair boring, probably."

Martin follows the thread of the conversation closely; it's easy enough to keep track with Daine's spoken questions and answers, and he appreciates that she's making at least part of it verbal. As she runs through all the necessary particulars, he feels himself finally beginning to relax a bit, releasing a tension he didn't know he had.

He's sitting on the floor again, off to the side and out of the way, when Daine begins talking about taking cat shape. He lowers his mostly-empty teacup and stares at her in open bewilderment.

"I - you can do that?" he blurts. Christ, it sort of makes sense, doesn't it, with her existing connection to animals. He has to struggle not to look too excited; this isn't about showing off or having fun, it's about helping John. But if it could help him, just to make this... situation more endurable, that... well, that would really be something.

"Boring," he adds belatedly. "I don't think it'll be that. Please, I - anything you think will help."

John isn't sure quite how to feel about the possibility -- or, hell, the incipient reality -- of her taking cat shape. He knows he really can't complain; it's past midnight and she's going well out of her way to help him, for no more compelling reason than the fact that she knows Martin and probably feels sorry for the both of them. But he also can't help but feel preemptively embarrassed at how much he's about to be... well, shown up. There can't be more than a handful of people in this bloody city who can just become cats at will, and one of them just happens to live up a few floors and is about to show him how it's done. As if even this niche humiliation isn't so specific that there isn't someone within shouting distance who's ready and able to actually demonstrate how to handle it gracefully.

Maybe she senses his unease -- maybe her magic allows for that; he doesn't know much about it, and evidently Martin never had a complete picture, either -- but part of him rather suspects her 'boring' descriptor has less to do with painting an honest picture of how it will look and more to do with subtly trying to nudge Martin's attention elsewhere. He almost wishes it had worked; this is all intimidating enough without the thought of Martin's curious scrutiny added to the mix. But then again, what else is Martin supposed to do? Go to bed and pretend none of this is happening? Read a book?

"Actually," Daine says as she starts to get to her feet, "I've an idea about how the two of you might talk easier without me here. One of my friends... he's not here anymore, but he couldn't speak aloud, so he used this little board to talk to folk. It had letters and numbers and common words on it all laid out in a grid, and he'd point to them with a laser pointer, so you could read what he wanted to say. You could probably make something like that for John. It'd have to be bigger, is all, so he could use his paws." She straightens, then gestures towards the WC. "Um. I'm just... my clothes don't come with me, so."

John drops his gaze instinctively as Daine heads into the WC and shuts the door, wondering for an uncomfortable moment just where his clothes have got to. It's not as if he left them in a heap on the deck of that illusory ship. Are they still part of him, somehow? Transmuted into fur? Christ, they'd better still be on him whenever this wears off.

He can hear some faint rustling from the WC, but there's no flash of light or anything obvious to indicate that there's some astonishing bit of magic happening. There's just a brief pause, and an insistent meow. And when Martin goes to open the door, a fluffy tabby walks out.

Hullo, Daine says cheerfully, looking perfectly comfortable in her cat body.

"Right," says Martin, warming to the idea as Daine describes it. "Yeah, that - I can do that. That'd be great." He smiles in gratitude for the thought, for a moment staying put before he realizes what she's actually suggesting is that he work on it now. Which makes sense, of course, the sooner the better; but there's also the underlying hint is that this, whatever she's about to do - or whatever she's about to do with John - is private.

That, too, makes sense. John is overwhelmed and frustrated and probably wants as little attention as possible while this happens. Still, it's hard not to feel a bit stung - he's every bit as invested in helping him acclimate to this as Daine is, if not moreso; it's just that there's not a great deal he can actually do. Being shooed away onto a different task better suited to his small, specific skillset is too familiar for it not to hurt.

But he's being childish; he knows that. He gets to his feet slowly, nodding to Daine as she heads to the WC, and waits long enough to see her step back out. Her cat form is so fluffy and charming he almost can't resist being outwardly delighted, though he manages to school his expression into something more serious and befitting the occasion. This whole thing is just so weird, the least he can do is pretend it's... not? Also a bit too familiar, really.

The bedroom is really the only space there is for him to sequester himself, and he heads in and shuts the door gently behind him. It feels... odd, uncomfortable, to be letting John out of his sight, but he trusts Daine has this in hand.

He doesn't have a lot in the way of supplies to actually make this grid she's suggested - he'll need to go shopping tomorrow anyway, to get whatever John needs, and he can pick up some sort of poster stock then. For now, he settles onto his bed and begins making a list of words on his phone.

There isn't much to hear from outside - even a cat that doesn't know how to use his body is quiet, he supposes - and before long he starts to feel the loneliness sink back in. No capital L this time, at least, but it's still a bit of a pain, feeling sorry for himself when he's just. Fine. When no self-aggrandizing 'warlock' decided to bully him with a completely undeserved existential crisis of a prank. When his flat is not, in fact, empty. When not even an hour ago he was literally holding John to his chest.

Best not to think about that, really. He breathes out like he's trying to physically excise these unwanted thoughts, and settles in to focus on the task he's been given.

Edited 2019-09-24 18:52 (UTC)

It's sort of awful, how grateful he is when Martin takes the hint and quietly shuts himself in his bedroom to work -- or just to give them some privacy, most likely (he doubts Martin has poster board coincidentally tucked away in his closet). At this point, he probably ought to be beyond embarrassment, but he finds he still has plenty to spare for the thought of Martin watching as he makes what will surely be some awkward attempts to get this new body under control.

Hell, being observed by Daine is bad enough, and he doesn't even know her. It would be easy to let that cocktail of embarrassment and unfamiliarity sharpen into resentment, but as she briskly sets about educating him, he finds he can't. She's too bloody sensible. Her evident familiarity with the whole idea of getting used to a new shape, combined with an apparently natural aversion to mincing words, make her an empathetic and efficient teacher. Nor does it take him long to appreciate that beneath her folksy exterior is a deep well of biological knowledge, which makes her really rather good at describing human equivalents for cat things (like how he might think of his paws as hands to better keep his claws in check, which puts a merciful end to his tendency to get snagged on Martin's carpet).

After about an hour, he's reached the point where he's confident he can walk and even run normally, his claws are under control, and jumping onto high places is only slightly terrifying. Before changing back, she coaxes him into making the very high jump onto the counter of the WC, so he can actually get a look at himself for the first time.

His reflection is... a shock, to put it mildly. He'd gathered that he was brown, but that's about the extent of it. He didn't know his ears were so bloody large. Or that he was so... long. Apparently Magnus saw fit to turn him into an oriental shorthair. Christ. He should probably just be grateful he didn't go with a bloody sphynx, instead.

Daine pronounces him 'good enough to be getting on with' -- John can't decide if that's an insult or praise, and quickly gives up trying -- and as he leaves the WC so she can situated, he finds himself eyeing Martin's bedroom door. Now that he feels like less of a disaster, guilt gnaws at him. Martin, of all people, shouldn't have to sequester himself. What if he's... lonely?

It's a stupid thing to worry about, probably; Martin's flat is currently as full as it's ever been (unless he's hosting dinner parties he hasn't yet mentioned). But he's still shut away, and after a few moments' hesitation, John walks up to his door and rears up onto his hind legs, one paw braced against the wood, the other rattling the doorknob.

Martin manages to spend about fifteen minutes compiling some words before he feels like he can't think clearly anymore and he sets his phone aside with a weary huff. It's finally hitting him how deeply exhausted he is; the whole week has been a bit much, but after even their brief stint at the party, after all the panic and anger and the absurd long walk home, now it all hits him like a slow avalanche. He wants to get up and move around to stay awake, and more than that he wants to check on how John's doing, but he makes himself stay put. In the end, the effort to do nothing wins over the effort to stay wakeful, and he finds himself lying back, dozing off despite his own reluctance.

He jolts back to his body when the doorknob rattles, his heart pounding with sudden, ridiculous fear. Disoriented, feeling a bit sick from hunger, for a moment forgetting where he is - that had almost stopped happening, and it's not a welcome feeling now - he sits up and stares at his door, the knob shaking a bit, before it all comes back to him in a dizzying rush.

"Oh-" Shit, how long as he it been? He staggers off the bed and opens the door, half-expecting to see John standing there, and... well, he does, but just. Down on the floor.

"Sorry," he says, rubbing his face. "You... Are you all right? Did Daine-"

She steps out of the WC a moment later, human once again. He must not have actually been out that long. She gives him a brief but encouraging assurance that John will be all right and promises to send him the full details on what John'll need. She looks fairly tired herself, and excuses herself quickly. He'll have to thank her properly when he has a chance; right now, he's a little relieved to be alone again with John.

Of course, now he doesn't know what to say.

"All right?" he says softly, half-heartedly. "Christ, I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted." It's so strange, not hearing John's voice answer him, just... looking at him and having to guess at his thoughts. He shrugs, a bit hapless, not sure what to offer or suggest. "Do you want to sleep?"

Christ, did he wake him? He's been so keyed up on a mixture of adrenaline and the sensory nightmare he's still getting under control; it hadn't occurred to him that Martin might simply be exhausted. And once Daine has excused herself, and left the two of them alone together, his remaining stores of nervous energy start to rapidly drain away.

He responds to Martin's question with a low trill and a blink of agreement. For a moment, he catches on the realization that for him, that's really all there is to it: no human routine of changing into PJs and brushing his teeth. He just needs to decide where to lie down, which isn't exactly a head scratcher. He turns, making his way over to the couch and leaping up onto the cushions with a competence that would've been wholly foreign to the John of sixty minutes ago. And there he curls up, as if to make a point: see, perfectly fine, nothing to worry about.

Sure.

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on the care & feeding of a cat who is not a cat // for John

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